My Twenty-Something Life

theatlantic.comON TV, DADS ARE IDIOTS, AND THAT'S NOT A GOOD THING 

On television shows, dads have been portrayed as incompetent dolts reflecting and encouraging a damaging attitude towards men and childcare.

This was such a good read. I’m a bit media obsessed, TV and movies, and for me it’s always a good reminder to not take fluff movies at face value-the characters are often flawed and should not be the standard in real life.

I’m so happy to be a parent in 2014 with my husband. We are really striving for equality in parenting. We’re not perfect but I don’t think there was ever the expectation that I would be the primary caregiver. We both have our time with Jack while the other person works. The Ginger takes care of Jack at night while I’m working. He knows Jack’s body language, mood, and sounds. Just this morning I was trying to get Jack back to sleep because it was still early and the Ginger yelled up the stairs that it sounded like he needed to burp. He knows his kid. As it should be. I love that. I don’t know how there is any other option. 

“The Atlantic has charted in multiple stories over the past couple years: if we want gender equality, men have to step up as parents to free up their partners as workers. And not when the kids are teenagers, but when they’re babies. 

"What I’ve noticed in my own life and among my friends,” Oppenheimer said. “The men who’ve spent a good deal of time with their kids—maybe not as much as their wives, but a good deal of time—there is a seamless transition as the kids grow up. They develop a competency that they are proud of and that stays with them." 

I’ve noticed a key variation on this pattern, too. Men who chose to—or had to—spend time alone with their infants develop more parenting skills than those who don’t have to "solo,” as I call it. And those early experiences compound as the children get older. If you know what you’re doing when the kid’s two months old, you’ll be more likely to know what you’re doing when the kid is ten months or ten years old.“